Foula folly or foul

With our ferry booking sorted our packing all done, the text messages between me Dunc and Hamish were wee reminders like - don’t forget your toothbrush (a reference to TV show I was once on) and don’t bother with the dancing shoes there’s not even a shop on Foula never mind a disco, needless to say we were all on a high and kittled up ready to get to Foula that April Tuesday morn, the previous day me and Hamish had taken a look out to sea along the route the wee ferry would be taking there had been a bit of wind but the swell didn’t look too bad?

Come morning I was sitting propped up on my bed watching the big ferry go past my excellent window view at the grand, the packing was mostly complete, I had time to do a last-minute kit check, then some research into the areas we should visit once we got onto the isle of Foula, my phone rang it was a Shetland number! OH no thinks I not again? but unfortunately my first thought was right! it was the ferry company the Foula ferry was cancelled yet again for me due to weather, I was gutted, I said so to the woman on the phone she was apologetic but said the weather they get sea condition wise around Foula was much different from what I would likely see around the mainland, and the ferry would have to cancel if it felt it was unsafe, It was with a heavy heart that I had to tell Dunc and Hamish. lads our ferry is cancelled, they were also gutted and genuinely felt for me not just for their own loss, oor island camping adventure would now not happen, Dunc messaged to say he was all packed anyway and wanted to give his tent and camping equipment a go, we could still go somewhere for two nights? Hamish said he would like to go walking up the north mainland, but for this day now he would now take his wife out but could join us for a night camping the next day, he was keen for a walk up around the north mainland coast, he even reckoned we could visit a tidal island and he knew a good place to camp on a beach

Duncan said he would pick me up at two PM as he was heading to Eshaness for a walk with his boys first, I checked out my hotel room leaving some bags at the grand and went for lunch at the dowry café, whilst Dunc was at Eshaness cliffs he had a check at the sea conditions of the west coast! It was blowin a hooly, we had been doubting the ferryman’s cancellation, in Duncs own words -apologies to the ferry men it wid be a rumble oot in yon in a peerie boat, translation- the wee boat would have been tossed about out there today, Dunc knows about such things so I guess its for the best the ferry got cancelled,

Chucking all my bags in the back of duncs wee white van we set off for north mavine, I had got to thinking I wouldn’t be visiting up there again but here I was setting off to camp, at the outset of the trig point adventure I had been keen to camp up at fethaland, I wanted to visit the most northern part of the mainland and explore the abandoned fishing village, this never happened for numerous reasons but it looked hopefull I may get a walk out that way now, once we set up camp we done a bit beach combing looking for driftwood in the hope we could make a wee campfire later when it got dark, there wasn’t a lot of driftwood, plenty plastic junk but not enough wood for much of a fire, this didn’t bother me as I have grown to realise we shouldn’t really be having fires outdoors any more its just a waste of natural resources and bad for air pollution, Dunc was keen on a fire though, we opted to drive round to the ollaberry shop to see if they had any firewood? I have visited this area a couple of times before, big Jim that works with us lives up this way, I had recently been trying to talk him into saving the remote telephone box from demolition there, he could buy it for a pound to renovate it for the community, just like the one out at Burrastow that I love I said to him, but he’s not wanting the hassle, we caught the shop just before shutting time but they don’t sell firewood anyway, we had an exploratory drive around the area, for being remote some of the nice big homes have some good gardens, there is one house with a passenger plane in the garden the wings removed but looking braw, I bet it makes a great garden retreat I would love to see inside, there’s another house with its own mini lighthouse in among a square of trees someone had built a huge pyramid of multi colored balls and there was even a naked lady mannequin lying in a bathtub in someone’s drive! I do love a bit of upcycling garden art

We stopped at a quarry which had some obvious waste wood for our campsite, then settled down at our campsite and got the fire on, while also cooking Duncan’s saucer maet in his frying pan on my multi fuel stove while we drank beer and chatted, all was great until just before bed time a hail shower hit our camp site, we abandoned the outdoors taking shelter in Dunc’s more spacious tent for our last hour, of course this had to involve a whisky nightcap I had brought my favorite a Balvenie 12 year old, or I should say one of my favorites there is only good whisky and better whisky`s Balvenie in my book is one of the better ones

Hamish joined us in the morning he brought plenty stuff for getting a good fry up breakfast, which is a challenge for my no meat or dairy diet, I did have a few mega tasty farm eggs (thanks Mark), some of which I’m ashamed to say did disgustingly get stuck in my beard as I bit into the yoke on a roll, Hamish had even brought camp chairs he had us fed and his tent up in no time, he is such a problem-solving fixing ball of energy

We set off for the island of Uyea it would be roughly a ten-mile round coast walk back to our camp site to take in this island, to begin with it was a good gravel land rover style track, strangely we passed A sheep that was standing not moving much foaming at the mouth and shaking no very well looking! The fields strangely had big white boulders strewn all over it was the rock type I don’t know enough geology to name it, when we eventually got to the coast high up on the dramatic cliffs, we were lucky the sun was out with clear skies and spectacular views over the geo stacks to the north

Uyea isle is a tidal island at low tide you simply walk over a beautiful soft golden small beach among high cliffs and geo stacks, we had spent too long at breakfast the tide had unfortunately turned the crossing was under water, but we did have a nice spot of soft sand to watch the waves crash ashore and celebrate with a beer each, there was some seals playing in the surf they seemed to enjoy the crashing waves, we could see their whole shape(normally you only see the heads) due to the clear water with golden sand below it,

Following the coast back round meant a lot of weaving in and out of plenty more voe`s, the sun kept on shining, so much so that I ended up with my face burnt! it was a cool sea breeze which meant you never truly felt the intensity of the sun on the skin,

Hamish had even brought a fire pit style BBQ, the boys didn’t take long in firing up the food and the fire, for our night on the beach camp fire site the second for me and Dunc, gratefully this time there was no hail shower, with a roaring fire and plenty layers on along with a fold out camp seat, this was glamping for me Hamish even put music on a wee speaker, while I tried to get him to acquire a taste for whisky. I did feel slightly out of it as my environmental conscience worries about camp fires and cooked farmed meats, it was such fun though I just had to shove that stuff to the back of my mind for the night

The plan on the next fine morning was for a walk out to fethaland, I am a sleepy heid in the morning it was nearly nine before I surfaced! by which time the boys had started getting things ready for breakfast and breaking down the camp site, something went wrong with my multifuel stove half way through boiling a pot of water for coffee it was a total failure! Its probably my fault somehow but I am disappointed in the multi fuel stove, its an absolute faff which I cannot be bothered with, I would rather eat stuff cold than be bothered especially in the mornings, minus my failure on the hot water front for teas and coffees we had a hearty breakfast,

The history of the area of fethaland is fascinating I had read so much on so many different subjects about this area that it all became foggy in my head, the history of the people the rocks the sea, the fishing the crofting, without my reference books to hand I could not remember exact details of all the flora fauna and history of this region that I had read of, for example some of the oldest rocks in the whole world are here, there is an abandoned village where messages were carved into rock and an ancient settlement that had made bowls form soap stone, it was the birthplace of one of Shetland’s most famous photographers jack ratter, along with all of that and more that I can no longer remember, once up at the lighthouse it is also the furthest north you can walk on the Shetland mainland,

We cleared away our camp site and drove the short distance to isbister to park up and begin our walk, we had glorious sunshine the whole walk I carried waterproofs and extra layers unnecessarily, its an undulating land rover track firstly uphill to pass the trig point that I had previously visited months ago, Dunc and Hamish didn’t bother going up to bag it, I guess it’s not on their agenda perhaps they are not box tickers like me, as we approached the abandoned settlement which at one time was Shetland’s biggest fishing village, we spotted at least thirty seals basking in the sun, they also spotted us and started their ungracious belly flop into the sea in a panic, well most of them a couple continued to bask

Something large flew into my face and specs then didn’t go away I was thinking a cleg but when asking the boys? Wits on ma heid? it was a big bumble bee that had taken a shine to my tammy! I ended up having to take it off as the big bumble bee would not let go, I laid it on the top of a roofless Bod and said to the lads don’t let me forget that hat on the way back, as a child there was countless bees around the local meadows, me and my pals would go collecting them in jars off the top of meadow flowers then shake the jars and release the bees near the girls around their skipping ropes, then as we grew older we would just kill them viewing them as nasty pests, my dad had a trap for them in the garden at summer it was a jam jar and water, nowadays I wanted to feed this one and wouldn’t dream of killing it, I was worried it was hungry and wished I had a bee rescue kit with me like big Jim has bought,

It was a pleasant walk up to the lighthouse, we were rewarded with fantastic views once we were there, the sun was out with only thinly scattered high light clouds the type that never blocked the sun, also no heat haze to spoil the endless horizon, our view out over to yell and Unst was picturesque clear, me and Dunc were pointing out places that we have been should go to would like to go to, Hamish was dreaming of kayaking the coast which on days like this when there’s no real swell either kayaking is probably the ideal way to see this part of the world

On the way back down the huge bumble bee was still loving ma tammy! or is it a beanie a bobble hat or a bunnet? Its defo not a wooly hat as its synthetics but this bee was strangely loving it, I gathered an empty shell placing a crumbled piece of oat trail bar, hoping there must be some sugar in that bar that the bee would love; thinks I? I will never know I had to scrape its last unwilling leg of ma tammy with this shell, before leaving it on the roof top in the shell with biscuit, hopefully it had a scran then flew of to a field of flowers, although it would Probably need to fly a fair distance for that!

We picked up three pals on the hike out? three Shetland ponies came of the hill to follow us probably thinking we had food, I discovered a buried car with just a steering wheel poking through I felt I should take a shot at driving this island! I took my specs of for this photo and that was the last I seen of them

When Duncan dropped me and my stuff of at the grand, the workies on the back windows of the hotel were in a flap, they had removed a window to do some repairs, then the owner’s dog had jumped out the open window onto the scaffold and escaped to street level and was now gone! They informed me that the film crew for the TV show Shetland was kicking off at the hotel. They had seen them as they chased the dug, This turned out to be fake news the film crew stars extras and support crew, were using the grands dining areas as a sort of canteen not filming there, I have never seen the series and know nothing about it but the hotel was full of people as I tried to check in! there was two police that I suspect were not police! they had shimmer stuff in their hair, also the film folk had a reasonable que for a food van outside and countless folk going in and out the grands front door and reception area, perhaps had I known who was who? I could have had my selfie pole out for photos with TV stars? Harvey the hotel owner was mega apologetic that my room wasn’t ready, could I come back in an hour? Absolutely no problem Harvey I can see how busy you are, OH BTW do you know your dogs escaped out the back window? Eh no it couldn’t have! Well, it did - busy day for Harvey indeed, the link to the video hamish made - https://youtu.be/33jsydo95Yc

I went for some lunch at the peerie shops café this now must be the last café I had not been to, by the time I had lunch my room was ready, I was back in my favorite double room with the awesome window view (braw) I watched down on the harbor pier later as the film crew vans packed up to leave, there must have been ten vans some loaded with equipment some mini buses for people, also private cars and a couple of small trucks,